Your discipline is your FREEDOM

Transcript

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Well, what's going on guys? Welcome back to another episode of the Extreme Lifestyle Living Podcast. Now, today what I want to talk about is your discipline, and I want to talk about your discipline and the relation of how you gain your freedom.'cause most people think freedom means doing whatever you want, however, however you want, with whatever you want to, whoever you want. And I feel like this is a social construct that has been created through. Social media, to be completely honest. And I think there's a lot of misguidance out there from, you know, oh, you should be a millionaire. Oh, you should be in the best shape of your life. Oh, you should be in the best relationship, or whatever it may be. And I think the biggest thing that social media has done has really strained, strained, strained, strained. Our conception of freedom and freedom is literally. All comes from your discipline as to what you do for your structure, and I wanna talk about four main talking points as to your discipline and how it is your freedom. Number one is, though I already alluded to it, structure creates your freedom. There's no other way around it. In freedom. You have to change your concept of it as we'll talk about in a bit. Number two, when you have discipline, it removes your emotional decision. Making, which again, a lot of your freedom ideology is based on your emotions. Right? And if you think about it, number three is freedom. Without discipline, it leads to destruction. So literally all those people out there that you think have this freedom that you want on social media or any other idea as to the financial gains or whatever, it is only a snippet of the bigger picture. There's 1% you're seeing showcased, whether it's a fitness goal, whether it's a freedom of traveling or whatever their perspective is like. There's a lot of destruction behind the scenes. You always hear the top people in the world, whether like they're the top people that are like the business moguls making the most money, or the people that are in the, like the, the most elite level of your, whatever your avenue of life you're looking at from whatever perspective it is, when all of these people have the freedom, you think that they have. There's always the back end of some type of destruction where they're not fulfilled, they're not truly happy, they're alone, they're isolated. They sacrifice or sold their soul to get some type of freedom that they thought was real. And the last talking point,'cause I don't wanna get too into them too much before I start just hitting them all and just kind of going in on them, is discipline compounds. And that's the thing that no one realizes that your discipline compounds, which creates your freedom, right? So to bring it back to the first talking about, uh, talking points, structure creates your freedom is when you know your plan, you're not guessing. You're actually moving with a purpose. You're not anxious about what to do. You just do what you know you need to do to get to where you gotta go. And the biggest thing about your structure creating your freedom is that when you're disciplined, just do the tasks that you need. That's when you create the freedom. You don't just wake up unless you're a trust fund baby with a limited amount of visa for your mom or dad because you're just spoonfed, then none of it's real. You know when you have a when, if you're sitting here within a relationship, if you're sitting here in a job that you like, if you're sitting here in a physical position that you like compared to where you used to be, none of that came from just showing up and being free within your life, and you just came to you. You created some form of structure. You created some form of a plan where you stopped guessing in your nutrition, you stopped guessing in your education, you stopped guessing from your financial goals, and you stopped. Becoming anxious about what you should do when you start following the plan. So the first one is your, your discipline creates a lot of structure, which then in terms creates the freedom. It's not fucking given to you. And the biggest thing that discipline creates when it comes to structure and freedom is it removes any of the emotional decision making. You don't rely on your motivation because no one's motivated every fucking day to do their steps. No one's motivated every day to go to the fucking gym. No one's motivated every day to show up for work and put on their peak attitude and be the best versions of themselves. Fuck, no one's motivated every day to be in a fucking relationship for fuck's sakes. And it's just like, you know, when I like working with so many people over the last, past three to four years of changing their life and really leveling up, like this whole concept of freedom is such fucking bullshit. I know it kind of sound triggered right now, but there's a couple clients I'm, I'm working with that, you know, just really gotta understand this concept of discipline. You have no freedom in your life if you're not disciplined to create it. And when you're not disciplined, you're gonna be running rampant with your anxiety. You're gonna be running rampant with your depression, your self imposter syndrome, all of these different things. And when you're disciplined and know what you need to do and have a plan, you're not gonna rely on your fucking motivation and how you feel in those days. You do the work regardless of how you fucking feel. I'm gonna say that one more time. You do the work regardless of how you feel. If you're on a fat loss journey and you're struggling to lose fat and you can't confidently say the last six months, you put every ounce of effort into your nutrition, going to the gym four to six times a week doing mobility every single day, go fuck yourself in the most nicest way possible. If you are in a relationship or in a personal relationship with your family, and you haven't showed up every single day and put in the work for your boundaries, put in your work for your, your personal. Things you need to work on. If it's anxiety, depression, imposter syndrome, or whatever ailments you got mentally, if you did not put in the work, you do not deserve to have the freedom and that comfortability in relationship because you didn't fucking earn it. And it sounds harsh, but I think that the, the concept around it is. We live in a world where you can open up your phone before you get outta bed and you fuck your dopamine up so bad, and then you're just depressed for the rest of the day. You're numb for the rest of your day. You're avoiding the true fucking work. And if you can rely on discipline, and actually to be full transparent, I can't find the book right now and I don't wanna get off on too much of a tangent, but I literally have a book right now on discipline, and I'm one of the most disciplined people in my life. A hundred percent. I don't know anyone else that's more disciplined than me in my immediate life. That's why I have an online community, because there's no one that I feel that's close to me. This isn't a bash of my clients or anyone else around me that I hang out with or not, but I just, no one's, no. No one's out working me. I do the work regardless of how I feel today, I was in a fender bender. Today's Thursday, June 19th, and I'm recording this. I was in a fender bender, so someone rear-ended us on Tuesday. I still went to the gym Tuesday. I still went to the gym on Wednesday. I went to the Emerge on Wednesday and had to sit there for four hours and get an x-ray. And then I had to go through a bunch of different policies with insurance companies and make sure that everything's situated. So this lady that hit us and ran can take care of us for the, for what she just did to us. And do you think I wanted to do that? Do you think with a little bit of a headache that I had that I want to get on the fucking treadmill and hit my step goal and yeah, sure. This may sound insane, but again, your discipline is your freedom. And if you think that anything in this fucking life is gonna come to you easy, it's not. So when you have discipline, you remove your emotional based decision making, making this fucking whole different ideology. Ideology of your freedom, and you should feel certain ways and have certain results that you just didn't put the work in. You do the work regardless of how you feel. Prime example, when you're at work. When's the last time that you showed up late for work and didn't feel some type of way? You can't even tell me that unless you had a job that you didn't like. If you, if you gotta work at 9:00 AM and you wake up at 8 45, you will sell your fucking soul to get there for 9:00 AM. Why? Why doesn't that translate into your interpersonal relationship? Who's gonna have anxiety? Why doesn't that translate when, oh, fuck, my boundary was pressed. I gotta change that immediately. Why don't you have that same effort when it comes to your career and you're pissed off about how much money you make? You don't do it'cause you're not disciplined. You have emotions that you just let run rampant. And prime example for building muscle and it's losing fat. If you're not in a position that you wanna be in, it's'cause you didn't do the fucking work. You let your emotions and feelings at some point run rampant and it is what it is. And the thing that I. Literally what I guess I'm gonna tell you what I'm kind of getting into is the freedom without discipline leads to your destruction, and that's what it is. Look at people with no structure. They're not free, they're lost as fuck. They're running rampant, and that's why everyone becomes a product of their fucking environment when everyone around them is just a bunch of bums that are lazy. Like they, there's, they, there's this saying that says, if there's nine people around you that are broke, you're the fucking 10th. If there's nine people around you that are outta shape and don't have the physical, uh, physical fitness level that you want, you're the fucking 10th person. If there's nine people around you that are in unhealthy relationships, you're the 10th person that in an unhealthy relationship. If there's nine people around you that are unfulfilled, just chase comfort and end up stuck and just literally avoid and numb their life, you're the fucking 10th. Freedom without discipline leads to your destruction. And if you don't have discipline, you're gonna sit there and fucking be emotional based every single day. And the thing that makes me so irritated about this is because I've been doing this, I'm 30 years old, I've been doing the same fucking shit for my fitness goals for 15 years. And some people just think that they deserve to have stuff within three to five years. What about the 30 years you didn't do Fucking nothing. You, everyone like you know, I'm 30 year now, a lot of my friends are 30. Obviously a lot of my clients are between 25 and 40. And every single one of us feel like we should be further than we should be. The harsh reality is you avoid and numb yourself for too many years till now. You have to overcompensate for that. There's gonna be years, you're gonna have to work over fucking time. Same as a relationship. Do you think just because you wake up one day, you think you deserve a better relationship, you're just gonna walk ass, walk your ass into somebody that you know, just treats you great? No.'cause you're, it's, it's, it's a law of attraction. You gotta put out what you get back. And it just is what it is. And freedom doesn't come without discipline. And if it you have, if you don't, if you're not disciplined and don't know what you need to do on a daily basis for your physical, your mental and emotional spiritual health, you're gonna be down a destructive path. You're gonna be emotionally based and you're gonna chase your comfort. You're gonna end up stuck. You're gonna end up pissed off. And. The biggest thing, the reason why that triggers, triggers me is'cause I just feel like there's a lot of people out there that are just being victims. And I'm not denying the shit that you guys gotta go through. I'm not denying that this shit's this shit is hard. And if you want to make it a sob story and think that this is like, oh well, you know, it's easy for you.'cause the life you had. I was hit by a car accident, I was hit, literally hit by a car. And woke up in, in, in a fucking, in a white blanket because they were trying to cut me out of a fucking car. I have a torn rotator cuff. I have a torn left pack. I had inguinal hernia surgery. I got a concussion with the yin yang, where I was diagnosed with PTSD, ABC's, O-C-D-O-C-D, and all these different things. So don't even try to come at me about things are fucking this way or that way. I had to get. Fight my way tooth and fucking nail to get where I'm at. I didn't want to be disciplined to, I had to confront the fact that I grew up in foster care and my father wasn't around, and what I had to do to fucking figure out what it is like to be a man. I didn't want to sit there and have to build discipline around the fact that my grandparents were broke as fuck and didn't have no retools and resources because their lack of discipline to create their own freedom. I didn't wanna confront that. I didn't wanna have to confront the fact that my mom wasn't around the way that she should have been and still isn't around the way that she should be, nor is my father and other things, and not to create my freedom. I didn't want to have to embrace the fact that I was hit by a fucking car. Literally totaled, like literally for the rest of my life that I was on paper confirmed I shouldn't even be doing what I'm doing. I didn't wanna confront that. I don't wanna confront the, the hundreds of thousands of dollars that I'm in debt because I tried to go to school, get student loans because hey, that's what I thought I was supposed to do. But we're not gonna let all that fucking dictate my life no different than how this car accident I was in. I'm gonna let it dictate my fucking life. And so many of you guys need to rely on discipline around the boundaries and standards that you need for the person you wanna become, not who you are today. Who you are today is a representation of the fucking last 10, 15, 20 years of the lack of discipline, the lack of effort, and the lack of initiative. And like I can promise you this, nine times outta 10, the people that feel like they should be further than they are, there's always cracks in the fucking boat that water's coming in, that they avoid and numb. And it is what it is because the proof is in the pudding. And I don't wanna say it. I really don't wanna be that guy to be like, oh yo, if you're not where you're at, just because of your own self, I don't wanna be that guy. But I'm telling you right now, your discipline is your fucking freedom. If you wanna be freer in mental health and have less anxiety and less depression, you gotta be disciplined to fucking handle it. Go to therapy. Figure out what your depression's there. Go through your traumas. Go through your triggers, and if you don't. In the kindest way possible, go fuck yourself. It just is what it is. If you grew up and your parents never taught you how to eat nutrition and work out and do all these different things, guess what? Not only do you gotta learn how to do it, but you gotta learn how to conceptualize what you look like within that life while trying to figure out what the fuck it is. You're not a victim. You can be a victim if you fucking choose to be. And yeah, sure. A lot of these things that happen in your life may not be your fault, but they're fucking your responsibility. What if it was your kid? What if it was your sister? What if it was your brother? What if it was your wife? What if it was your husband? What if it was your loving mom or dad and they had all this shit happen to them? You would never look at them and, and judge them, or, you know, tell them that they should be somewhere else that they're not. If they did something that isn't where they need to be. You know, if you have a best friend and he's over there bitching at you about the relationship, and you know that they're the one that's a problem, you're not gonna sit there and comfort them and tell'em that their relationship is where it should be at. You're gonna give'em the hard reality and the truth. And I think the biggest thing too, when it comes to the fitness goals, the people underestimate how much fucking work it takes. Like straight up, it takes a lot of fucking work. Like, like, and I don't wanna compare anyone's situations because everyone's situations are different. But the biggest thing is that every single one of us wants freedom. Every single one of us wants to wake up, look in the mirror, and feel fucking phenomenal. And the comparison is always a thief of joy. So that's why I hate comparing. But to give you perspective, to give you perspective, the last three years alone, I haven't missed one fucking training session over the five. Five would've seven days of the week. Three years I did not fucking change. And three to four years and five years prior to that I was doing yoga, calisthenics and fucking physical therapy two to four times a week because I was in so much pain. And it's funny'cause I have some clients that like I'm training and they're have some injuries and ailments and you know, they're really frustrated at lack of results and, you know, pain and certain things like that. And. Literally from 2016 to 2017, that year when this started, I sat in my fucking house until 2021 doing cat cows, T wise lacrosse, balling my fucking body and going to physical therapy appointments. I worked my ass off to get here because my discipline removed my emotional based decision. I started doing the work regardless of how I fucking felt. Do you know how many times I went to the gym and touched the weights and gonna migraine and had to sit in the tub for three days? You can't even count it. And the reason why I'm saying all this is because I grew up unhealthy. I grew up poor. I grew up with no tools and resources. I had to conceptualize the idea that I had to get out my fucking ass and work for it. I had to go to the gym and put in copious amounts of hours of cardio. And now, sure that sounds unhealthy, but guess what? If you didn't fucking walk and get 10 K steps for the last 10 years of your life. And you're not getting it now, go fuck yourself in terms of your fat loss. If you can't look back of your, your fitness goals and say, Hey, I haven't tracked my approach, and you even put the work in the gym. How do you even look in the mirror and say you deserve something? That's like the same idea with your career. If you're not making enough money, what have you actually done to try to make more money? Have you even thought and conceptualize the idea that maybe the career you're in isn't the one you need, you should be doing? Have you even tested your own mental health to see like, Hey, maybe I should take other avenues, take a couple losses to try to figure out and gain some experience in this life? You probably haven't. And I don't mean to sound triggered, but it just is something that really gets me passionate because, you know, being in authority and working with so many different people, it's just, it's just mind boggling as to how every single one of us, no matter what length of the journey that we're on, gets super triggered at some point as to this idea of they deserve more. They just, they think and we all think we deserve more. And I'm, I'm just as guilty as that. That's why I have mentors in my corner. I literally, the last six months I've had a conversation with my business mentor and he's a really close finder of mine, and I'm very fortunate to have someone like that in my corner. And he called me out face to face on a zoom call. He said word for word. He goes, Hey. I don't want to be an asshole here or be the guy or bear bad news, but three times, several times you've brought up Deserve. He said, you said you deserve, you feel you deserve. And he goes, what is that in comparison to the work that has been done? Once I found that out, there's several things in my life I was avoiding. There's several things in my life that I wasn't going after, and guess what? It was a hard fucking pill to swallow. But guess what? I created structure to help me create that freedom. I stayed disciplined, so I removed my emotional decisions based making, and I did the work regardless of how I felt. I didn't rely on motivation to wake up and wanna fucking get after it. And to be honest, to be blunt with the life I got now and the career I got now I have 50 fucking plus clients. I love every single one of them. But do you think I'm still motivated every day to get up and do everything? Fuck no. Do you know how long it takes to do programs, especially at the level that I'm coaching because I love these people. I wanna give them the best service of their life, or I give them my whole team of like my physio, my chiro, my naturopath get, I get feedback from my, my massage therapist and I'm making all these intricate details into their program. I should tell all my clients to go fuck themselves. Guess what? Here's my programming. You go out and you take that feedback from those people and you go to the gym and figure it out.'cause that's what the world should fucking be giving you. But instead, I do other those extra steps. Do you think I'm motivated to do that every time? Week after week, getting, uh, 10, 15 people different coaching people's, uh, different, uh, programs being changed because of different ailments and different injuries and things like this. No, same thing with myself. Do you think I'm motivated to go to the gym all the fucking time? No, but I build structure and discipline to the point that I gotta literally got a treadmill in my living room and I move in 50 days. I'm moving 50 days and I gotta treadmill. That's how fucking dedicated I am. And I just think some people don't realize that freedom without discipline leads to your destruction. You rely on your fucking emotions. And it just is so frustrating because there's no secret hack. There's no secret hack, there's no, no one's gonna come save you. You're not gonna wake up and have an aha moment. You're gonna show up every single fucking day on any area of your life. And eventually it's gonna work. And that leads me to my last talking point, which is discipline compounds. Each rep in the gym, each routine you change for your mental health and your patterns. Each choice that you take to, to go towards the version that you want to be, to remove who you are today sharpens you. You gotta become someone you trust to put in the fucking work. And you gotta learn where your weak areas are at. And if you don't have discipline, you're never gonna figure that out. So if you truly want freedom in your life, you truly want that euphoric feeling that you think is out there in life. You gotta work for it. You earn it through structure. You master your schedule, you master your habits, you master your mindset. That's where you get the real power from. If you have any mental, if you have any mental health adversity from anxiety, depression, and you're relying on all these different things, that's to get you motivated to move forward. It's all a crock of shit. You have to create structure that you know is gonna keep the standard where you want to go. Hey, I have a lot of people that say they don't like track and macros. Do you think I like tracking macros? Fuck no. But do you like looking in the mirror and see what you see? Yes. So you do what you gotta do. You have a partner and you have a son. You have a daughter, you have a family. I can bet your ass you don't like getting up at four 30 in the fucking morning to go to the gym before the kids get up, which 90% of you guys probably don't do, because again, you lack fucking structure and not to sound like an asshole about this stuff. But there's no secret gimmick. And I grew up on welfare. I literally grew up on$9,000,$9,750 a fucking year. I, I'll never forget when I was in high school and my grandmother showed me, it's not even a T four'cause she didn't work. She was on welfare. She got social assistance. We got a fucking slip from the government. We had to just file. Just say we had it.$9,750 a fucking year. Do you know what that equates? A month less than a thousand dollars. Less than a thousand dollars a month that I grew up on. And then there's other ways around it. So don't talk about, don't sit there and sell yourself. This story of a victim of why you're not in shape, why you're not where you're at with life, with a relationship or your own self in the mirror or financially or your career. It's all on you. And the second you can real realize that is the second that your discipline will compound. Because you're gonna create the structure. You're gonna master your schedule, you're gonna master your habits, you're gonna master your mindset. And it's not gonna be easy. You're not gonna have to rely on motivation'cause you're gonna do the work. Work regardless of how you feel. And I just think this is something that you all have to conceptualize and just understand. It's a part of fucking life. If you wanna grow beyond who you've ever been, you're gonna have to do things you've never done for longer than you have been not doing them. So I'm gonna say that again. If you want to become someone you've never been, you're going to have to do things that you don't really necessarily have done before for longer than you haven't done them. You're 30 years old and you just started working on 28. Guess what? You have 28 years of being a lazy piece of shit. You're 35 and you wanna change your career. Guess what? You have the last 35 years of you not trying to change your career. You want to sit there and get a better relationship, a better inter, inter interpersonal relationship with yourself, better relationship with your mom, better relationship with your dad, your family, whatever. At whatever age it is. Well, guess what? The day you decided to do that, subtract all of the time that you didn't do it. And equate for that from not fucking doing shit. And it is super frustrating to understand that and embrace that, but on the other side of that door is your fucking freedom. It's your freedom. And I wish I could sit here and be a victim like some of you guys are and just sit there and you know, misery loves company, which is why I had that quote. If nine people around you are broke, you're the fucking 10th. If nine people around you are real shake, you're the fucking 10th. If nine people are around you and you're not where you want to be at, it's not gonna work out. Do you know what I mean? So I hope this wasn't too emotionally filled, but I just think I had to give you guys some real raw energy about how your discipline is, your freedom and'cause.'cause like I said, most people think their freedom is doing whatever the fuck they want, and it is to a degree. But that freedom comes from your discipline, creating that structure, removing your fucking emotions out of it, doing the work regardless of how you feel, and allowing your discipline to compound where each rep, each routine, each choice, each structure, you change every time you master your habit or master your schedule and could attack your mental health. That compounds. And once you become someone in your life that you can trust, then you'll start to realize you only deserve the work that you put in. And I'm gonna leave it there. This is a long episode. I do apologize. But this last past week got me fired up being an offender bender. I haven't been in a car accident and it's, well, I don't even wanna label it as a car accident, but I haven't been in anything like that since, like I was 16 years old. I'm 30 now. So it just really, really just changed my perspective. It just re reached, it just shook me to my core. It really shook me to my core. And I was hugging to Emma the other day and I was just super grateful that we were okay and we're, we're, we're like, you know, happy and healthy and have a schedule. Like even the, even at the hospital, they're like, do you need to write a note for like, work or anything? It's like, no,'cause we controlled our life. You know what I mean? So your freedom comes from your discipline. And when you're willing to show up every single day and put in each rep, each workout, each routine, each choice, then that's when your discipline's gonna compound. When you become someone, then you'll become someone you trust. So if you want the true freedom. Earn it through your structure. Master your schedule, master your habits, master your mindset. That's the real fucking power. So I hope this wasn't a little bit too harsh for any of you guys, but if you did feel any emotional rise from this, then that says everything that you need to know. Go to the mirror, ask yourself what, I had an emotional rise, and I can promise you two or three things is gonna happen. Number one, you're gonna be super fucking frustrated, and the first thing you're gonna try to do is avoid it. The second thing you're gonna try to do is either continue to avoid it or numb it. The third thing is gonna be the real answer as to what you gotta do. And is it changing your mental health because you're just not happy with who you are? Is it putting in more work in the gym because you just haven't put in enough work? Is your career bummed and you just hate it and you need to change and you need to make a leap of faith and get into maybe more education? Maybe take a mentorship course to take a certificate? Yeah.'cause I can promise you one thing, you're never gonna look back with regrets for changing your life and creating structure and discipline for your freedom, but you will look back with regrets when you don't fucking make a decision. And that's all I got. Let's fucking lock it in this week. Let's change. Let's keep leveling this fucking shit up. Let's get it.